Let’s start with a story from Jon Muth’s book“Zen Shorts:”
Two
traveling monks reached a town where there was a young woman waiting to
step out of her sedan chair. The rains had made deep puddles and she
couldn’t step across without spoiling her silken robes. She stood there,
looking very cross and impatient. She was scolding her attendants. They
had nowhere to place the packages they held for her, so they couldn’t
help her across the puddle.
The
younger monk noticed the woman, said nothing, and walked by. The older
monk quickly picked her up and put her on his back, transported her
across the water, and put her down on the other side. She didn’t thank
the older monk; she just shoved him out of the way and departed.
As
they continued on their way, the young monk was brooding and
preoccupied. After several hours, unable to hold his silence, he spoke
out. “That woman back there was very selfish and rude, but you picked
her up on your back and carried her! Then, she didn’t even thank you!”
“I set the woman down hours ago,” the older monk replied. “Why are you still carrying her?”
There
is an actual cost to holding onto things we should let go of. It can
come in the form of anger, frustration, resentment or something even
worse. The question is, can you really afford to keep paying the bill?
The
faster we learn to drop our emotional dead weight, the more room we
create for something better. I’m talking about everything from stewing
about the guy who cut you off in traffic this morning to still refusing
to forgive an old friend for an event 20 years ago.
We
have only so much bandwidth. We have only so much time. We only have so
much energy. Do we really want to invest any of our precious resources –
financial or otherwise – into something that will return nothing but
misery?
My question for you is, “What’s one thing you can set down this week?”
Go
ahead and pick something. A fight with your spouse, something a
politician said, your team losing the big game. Pick it, drop it and
then pause. For just a moment, simply pause and savor what it feels like
to no longer carry that burden and pay that price.
Then,
I want you to invest that extra into something more productive. If it’s
extra time, go for a walk. If it’s extra peace, take five deep breaths.
If it’s extra money because you decided to just pay the stupid traffic
ticket instead of letting it sit on your desk accruing late fees, then
take that extra money and invest it in something that makes you happy.
Play
with your kids. Take a nap. Just do something that makes you feel the
opposite of how you felt before you let go. I can guarantee you, this is
one investment you’ll never regret.
